As we’re getting ready to say goodbye to 2024, I’ve been dedicating some time in the morning lately to reflect. I am thankful for 2024 with its ups and downs. That for what I’m most grateful is Sofie recovering from back surgery. It’s been almost a year, and although it is still challenging to have such a stiff back, I do see some progress. Not without the help of physiotherapy and a very engaged assistant at school who has made her a strength training program they follow together each Monday, and all the “walking breaks” they take the rest of the week. All this to say that as always, I’m thankful for people who do their job with dedication and see possibilities instead of limitations.
I’m thankful for my husband and kids who bring joy and love to my life.
I’m thankful for friends who show so much kindness and generosity.
I’m thankful for all opportunities to learn and grow.
I might seem to present myself as having my s***t together here on social media, but I don’t 😅
I just like to share my joys, but I have also many questions, many doubts, the biggest maybe self-doubt. 🤭
Professionally, I’m at a crossroads. After changing jobs a year and a half ago, I’m really wondering if I want to continue working as a teacher. I love teaching and creating good relationships with my students. I love striving towards contributing to their learning and growth. Using my creativity to contribute towards a good and engage learning environment. But, I’m getting more and more skeptical towards schools as institutions. I feel they are run in very contradictory ways. If I am completely honest with myself, I see myself being overly stressed the last 20 years. Stressed with the pressure my role brings, and the feeling often of not being trusted by society. I see colleagues feeling exhausted. Students feeling helpless.
Is it schools? Is it me and my attention and thus attitude? I don’t know.
I resigned my jobb and from March I only have a 40% position at Dype Røtter working in a project to help refugees improve their Norwegian language skills through practical work, and gain more knowledge in how to better take care of their mind and body. A work I see as meaningful and important to help them better integrate to society. Which is all they want after fleeing from very tough living conditions in their home country.
What to do for the remaining 60%? That is the BIG question.
I will continue my studies in Arts and Crafts.
Should I take a one year program in Norwegian to be better suited to teach it? Is that the path I’m taking?
For the moment it seems unclear, and I need to gain some inner clarity to better see the way.
I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night worrying about my professional choices lately, but then I remember that I’m in a transition, and I need to be patient.
That is why I want to go back to my meditation practice, to create more space in my mind.
I need to slow down and limit my eagerness to do, to find “quick” solutions. I need to remind myself that life is a process and there is no end destination, when I feel I have something figured out, I often realize it is just temporary, because life keeps happening, and all I can do is keep going. Improve my ability to observe and avoid living reacting. Give things time.
Thank you , 2024, and welcome 2025. All I wish for is for my loved ones to be healthy and peaceful. The rest, we can figure out as we walk.
Yoga of Mukti 